Dear Annie, I Hate You! A Brain Aneurysm play shouting bravely about our silent condition

By Rebecca Middleton, Founder of HBA Support and Brain Aneurysms Patient

‘My brain aneurysm may be silent, but I won’t be’ is a mantra I live by and has in turn, helped me establish HBA Support three years ago. When I was diagnosed, I felt like I was facing a condition that largely no one knew about outside medical circles. I felt alone.

Our condition lacks awareness, acknowledgment, and understanding from a society that sometimes even struggles to spell it!

The words that are used to describe our condition live in the domain of the neuro world, who speak of cumulative rupture risks and localised dilation or the Circle of Willis and bifurcations. Haemorrhage, saccular, wall shear stress, and fusiform are words for another world. A place that the vast majority of brain aneurysm patients never expected to visit. These words are not in our everyday conversations with friends and family, not shared with friends over dinner.

Our experiences are often not accessible or relatable, not shared and not understood, kept in the dark, silent, meaning our experience of this serious but treatable condition is also kept silent.

“It was a sensation then to watch the acclaimed play ‘Dear Annie, I Hate You’ created by brain aneurysm patient and playwright, Sam Ipema.

The play is a funny and multimedia journey of a patient coming to terms with a diagnosis and her treatment journey. It’s unexpected, uplifting and refreshing in its honesty.

Some TV programmes have covered our condition, but for brain aneurysm patients, we are just one episode and it’s often the consequence of a rupture, the drama and the tragedy that is covered - and not the road to a diagnosis or the long tail consequence of treatment and recovery. To have this show share a real and raw experience of a brain aneurysm on stage was breath-taking and vital.

“I felt seen, heard and represented in the glorious technicolour of a complex and emotional journey through diagnosis and treatment."

Sam’s personal journey is powerful and represented in a way that makes patients – and nonpatients – reflect on the unpredictable nature of life. It’s uplifting, brutally honest and has made a real impact on audiences and critics both in London, where I saw it in May, and in Edinburgh last summer. In both locations, it has received excellent reviews, and the audience feedback has been amazing.

Sam and the producer, Sarah, report that patients share their own experiences and their own journeys with the performance team after the shows. All journeys are individual and unique, but as we have seen and experienced, there are shared challenges and barriers to care and support.

For me, having a brain aneurysm journey reflected on stage and a voice that spoke of our shared experience made such an impact. Her experiences inside the clinic room and the harsh language often used to describe risk brought back many memories.

Outside the hospital, friends struggling to connect and find the words after a diagnosis rang true as did her acknowledgement of a life before and after an aneurysm diagnosis, with a realisation that with this line in time, comes a better understanding of the beauty and priorities in your life and the important pieces you want to keep close to you no matter what.

The play does not shy away from the realities of a diagnosis, treatment, hospital stays and rehabilitation. As a patient, or as a family member or loved one who has supported someone you care for through this journey, it can be intense at times to watch. It does not shy away from the life-changing impact and the hard choices. But it does leave you with an uplifting sense of hope and courage. To be represented on a stage in such an incredible show is empowering and life-affirming.

It was a pleasure to meet Sam after the show and meet the woman behind this powerful piece of drama. Although the run is now over in London, it will go back to Edinburgh this summer. I would heartily recommend going along and experiencing this ‘masterly’ show for yourself. One critic called it ‘one of the best things I’ve ever seen’ – and I would agree.

“Silence is no longer an option for our silent condition. Sam’s play is a conversation and a window into our condition that urgently needs a louder voice and a better understanding. Thank you, Sam, for using your voice. As your brother so eloquently says, you really are a superhero."

If you would like to see Dear Annie I hate You, Sam and the Wild Geese Productions crew will be performing at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, at Pleasance Two, Pleasance Courtyard on 30th July and 4th-25th August (except the 12th) - the show is on at midday and will last 60 minutes. Here's more information about the Edinburgh run: https://www.pleasance.co.uk/event/dear-annie-i-hate-you

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